Apprehension

 

It's funny.  When you start something new, that may be a bit out of your comfort zone, you tend to dread it.  I know for a lot of us, eating better, loosing weight, and beginning an exercise program falls right into that "dread" category.  I know for me, when I decided to do TSFL I was apprehensive.  I worried that I might feel deprived or hungry or cranky or that it wouldn't work or that I wouldn't have the will power to succeed.  Well, almost 3 months later, and now I see myself at the other end of the spectrum.  My apprehension is no longer about IF I CAN do this but now it is about whether or not I can maintain it.  I gave myself a 3 month block of time in which I would not cheat, and I would give myself to the program 100%.  I told myself that no matter how much weight I lost in that three months, I would begin phase II of the program on November 9th.  Well, I am pleased to say I have not cheated, and have given the program my 100%, but now, I am kind of worried about entering the "real" world of choices again.  Have I learned all I need to learn??  Am I ready to make better choices on my own?  I have a list of foods in my head that I plan to eat on Nov. 9th...none of them being healthy foods of course.  I still feel myself justifying indulgence by telling myself I deserve it for being so good for 3 months solid.  To be honest, it frightens me.  TSFL does all the thinking for me, I just do what I am told, and I see results.  I know that I have made great strides, and that hey, I may slip up here and there, I am just hoping I have learned new ways to live and cope with out using food as a drug.  I guess only time will tell!!